Welcome!
I have designed this site to be a useful tool for you to be able to research writing techniques and to be a place where you and your fellow students can have an open and constructive dialogue with each other about your writing. It is important that every member of the class becomes an active participant in the creative process. By becoming a contributing member of the writing community, you will reap the benefits from that collaboration and produce pieces of writing that will astound and amaze all who have the privilege to read them.
Creative Writing II/Creative Writing II Honors 
This is a pretty impressive piece of prose, but I have a few comments on the structure and layout of your piece that I hope will help you to improve your work in the future.
The story is very short, which is good because your message is compact and succinct. Unfortunately, the drawback of your brevity is that the narrative is not very compelling, and it lacks depth of meaning. Perhaps in the future you may wish to lengthen your writing and explore the complexities of your theme.
Another interesting thing to note about your work is the use of the unqualified first person. “Who is this mysterious ‘I’?” the reader is left to wonder, building the reader’s curiosity in this way is an excellent technique, and I’ll admit that the only reason I’d possibly read any future sequels would be to find out the identity of this mystery character.
Lovely linguistic landmines like “astound and amaze” lend a certain quality of professionalism to your work while simultaneously showing off your penchant for the theatrical.
Overall, this piece shows pleasing progress towards becoming an excellent writer. I look forward to reading your work in the future, and hope to see you continue to develop your voice.