Blue Thread

My heart is a spider’s nest.

It has no feelings or regrets.

But there is this little spiders.

That is nothing like the rest,

For one its painted blue,

The same color as your eyes,

and it knows your favorite songs,

so it often sings along.

It knows the features of your face

that I could never replace,

and I dont know the reason why

But it makes a special kind of thread,

That reminds me of you.

So I guess I should feel bad

But I couldnt help my self, you see

I had to string it through your hair,

and wrap it around your waist,

Tie it to your thumbs

and kiss it on your face.

Till I saw it in your eyes,

and I couldnt tell you why,

but that put me on cloud 9

So now I must appoligize

For I simply cannot leave your side

Or it’ll pull my heart away

So please, just stay

2 thoughts on “Blue Thread”

I enjoyed the metaphor you used with the spider and I think it helps to portray your ideas that you wanted to express in this poem. A recommendation I have is to make sure to check your punctuation and grammar because it can hurt the flow of the poem or make it hard for the reader to understand your thoughts. (Ex. “But there is this little spiders.” Change it to something like “But there is this little spider” or “But there are these little spiders”. It depends if spiders is plural or not.)

I like how you compare the lover to a spider, it has many good metaphors and similes. The only thing I would revise you to do is check your punctuation. Overall, it’s a very good poem.